Tuesday, August 26, 2008


I wasn't planning on writing about this subject because I generally don't like to talk about personal issues, but this is such a big part of my life right now that I think it warrants a post.

I am having a hysterectomy this week. We have come to this decision after much research, consultation, and prayer. This decision was not made lightly, because we are very disappointed about closing the door on future biological children. What gives us comfort is to know that God is in control of even this, and He has blessed us so much by giving us the joy of having our daughter Grace. Perhaps down the road He will enable us to give a home to another child that we can adopt.

I'm not really nervous about the procedure because I have a wonderful doctor that I completely trust. Thankfully, my parents will be here to help us care for Grace during my time of recovery. There are so many family members and friends praying for us right now that we truly do feel a peace about the whole situation.

So why did I start crying when I registered at the hospital this morning? I think the finality of it all became very real when I signed the permission form for surgery. I feel like I am mourning a loss....though not tangible....it's the loss of the possibility of bearing another child. The nurse was very kind and told me it was normal to be emotional about this surgery, especially at my age.

Despite my sadness, I am looking forward to the improvement in health that this will bring. The bible teaches that all things work together for our good, and I am trusting in this promise. And, I am thankful for the wonderful support system of family, friends, and church members that have been such an encouragement to me.

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